Mum Stuff

This is one of the few pictures where I only slightly resemble a character off Wallace and Grommit - most times my similarity to an Aardman animation with gargoyle features and prominent teeth is uncanny.

I should also point out that my little boy had just weed on my shoes before this picture was taken!

Whenever I have to describe myself I instinctively list my functions - mum, wife, struggling and quite frankly haphazard domestic misfit. But this would only be scraping the surface. Being a mum of two tiddlywinks aged 4 and 6 (boy and girl), my world is a awash with tantrums, hilarity, extreme exhaustion and a million daft questions that leave me baffled.

I try to take my sketch book wherever I go and fill it with daft doodles of our doings.

Things I have out there that I have created are:

The Metamorphosis of Elissa Brown

This is a fantasy novel in which the characters are transformed from their usual college lives to something more sinister and violent. There is a little loving (friends who have read said they didn't realise I was so saucy which I was very surprised to hear), some blood and a splash of horror to get your adrenalin going - hopefully!

There is a Kindle version of this on Amazon:

Funny Love

A short and hopefully funny story about one woman's disastrous attempts to bring bondage, erotic dance and role play into her marriage.

This is available on Amazon:

Funny Festivities:

It is Autumn for Marianne Misfit. The weather is glorious and golden but there is the usual haphazard hilarity. Despite a farcical attempt at fancy dress, Marianne manages to survive the Halloween party from hell. The family trip to see the fireworks is a disaster ending in Marianne mud wrestling her daughter and her husband Andy trapped in a port-a-loo facing a three year old with a bad stomach. Christmas has lost its glow as Marianne is facing the problem of existing on a tight budget whilst trying to afford the usual presents and food. To make matters worse she has invited her snooty parents-in-law for Christmas dinner. Things get so bad that she almost calls the whole thing off claiming her children are infested with head lice. Her two friends Patsy and Lottie have different anxieties of their own, namely absent husbands and sore buttocks. Will Marianne salvage any Christmas presents from the goats? Will Lottie's blog continue whilst Colin's bottom is so sore? Will Patsy ever find out what her partner Jerry is getting up to in Thailand?

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